Plot Twist

I come from an abusive home. My dad was an alcoholic and a pathological liar. My stepdad, who I grew up with, was also an alcoholic. I was abused by both. I grew up hiding the sexual and physical abuse I endured. I thought by concealing it I was protecting my mom from more heartache. In my mind, it was my job to save her marriage... at 5 yrs old.

I never felt safe around men. It was not so much a fear as it was a distrust of their intentions. Because of the physical and sexual abuse I experienced as a child, I had never been very comfortable with physical touch. I struggled with the romantic part of affection. It made me feel like something was inherently wrong with me. After my divorce, I feared I would never be able to trust a man’s touch. Then... I met Josh. For the first time in my life I wasn’t resistant to being touched. When I met my husband, God healed something in me that’s been broken my entire life.

I know a lot of you have gone through horrific trauma, and (I write this through heartfelt tears) I want you to know God has something beautiful picked out for you: a unique path of healing. He loves you and healing is a part of His love for you. Don’t believe for one second that you will always be broken. You are not defective. You are not flawed. You are not defeated. God will win this battle for you.

If you would’ve told me 5.5 years ago that God was going to use my divorce to bring love into my life and heal something that’s always been broken in me—I would’ve said, “BUT HOW?!” In fact, I did say that very thing! I couldn’t see past my pain. And honestly, that’s ok if you can’t see past your’s either. God can. He can see far into your future. He’s working things together for your good—things that the enemy meant to cripple you for life. He’s weaving these plot twists into your story, and I can just imagine Him grinning ear-to-ear as He watches your jaw drop in disbelief of how He’s flipped the script in your life.